Tag Archives: Michael Eisner

7 steps to deal with ENVY

A month ago I attended the re-Set Business forum.  One of the panelists was Michael Eisner of the Walt Disney Company offering up his ideas about business, success and excellence. He spoke about the things that could prevent you from achieving your goals.  Eisner mentioned how was how envy was a destructive force in your life. He went onto say experiencing envy was a good cause for reflection.

But, what is envy? According to dictionary.com,

Envy denotes a longing to possess something awarded to or achieved by another: to feel envy when a friend inherits a fortune.

You know the feeling. You and a co-worker have been working hard all year, but he is the one that gets the end of the year award. Where is your prize?

Or, for the last six months you have been trying to get a job interview at a company you love only to discover, after just a month of job hunting, a friend has been hired at that same company.

You attend a party and another friend always has a crowd of people around them while you stand alone.

You begin to feel that warm feeling inside your chest. Its not a fuzzy or fun feeling. You begin to lick your lips and wonder, “why not me?”. What is wrong with ME? Why do THEY get everything while I’m still in the same place?

Envy. It can creep up on you or fill you up so fast that it takes your breath away. Michael Eisner is right, if you don’t follow the feeling it can lodge in your body and spirit like a tumor growing in it darkness and intensity. Envy conceived as a sin would have you wish that the receivers of the things you covet would experience a downfall or be deprived in some way. This is the dark side of envy- crafting the demise of another.

Is there a bright side? As with all sins/negative feelings they point to a place in you that needs some work. OK, that sucks, but isn’t it better you realize that, then loosen the wheel of the car of your rival? What can be done?

1. Acknowledge envy. The first step in any recovery plan is acknowledging it.

2. Pinpoint the feeling. “I am feeling envious because Susie was promoted and I thought I should had the job”.

3. Face the truth. Susie got the promotion. Maybe it was deserved, or, not. Nonetheless, she has it and you are stuck in the windowless cubicle while Susie moves into the new, but, tiny office with windows.

4. Be a bigger person. You want something and someone else got it. You can badmouth them, not a good idea, or you can walk up to them and give them a heartfelt congratulations.  People are attracted to attractive people. If you are a crank, you better be a damn good productive one, or you will be in cubicle hell for life.

5. Face another truth. Maybe you suck. OK. Too harsh? Face the fact the someone else just did better work, played office politics with skill, or in general, took extra steps to get the job done. Spend some time and evaluate what you did in relation to what the person received. Yes, there are people for whom the sun always shine, angels sing when they walk by and skies are blue. Generally, there is the hard truth to face, they did more. You may have become myopic in your view of the kind of work you were putting in. Or you are doing the same thing over and over.

6. Did you want it? I find I am feeling envious for another’s good fortune when in truth I was not interested in it. There are times, I must admit, I don’t want someone to win until I have. Do you really want what you want? Or, are you just becoming a greedy bastard? Be clear on what you want in life. Do your best to go after it and leave no dead bodies in your wake.

7. Be smarter. Be kinder. Be an attraction magnet by operating at your highest level of being (whatever that is). Make wise choices about what you want in life and realize there is a lot to go around.

How do you deal with envy?

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re-Set: The Business-Models of Tomorrow

Here is a quick rundown from the Re-Set Business conference.

VANITY FAIR and HARPERSTUDIO Invite You to a Business Forum with a Difference

re-Set: The Business-Models of Tomorrow

April 20, 2010

Where Disruptive Ideas Meet Provocative Insights

Mission Statement: re-Set Business is an innovative speaker series designed for senior-level executives to share thoughts with the world’s leading visionaries about how the world does business in a variety of fields, today and in the future.

Full disclosure: I attended the event as guest media.

The event was held at the Harvard Club in midtown Manhattan. First of all when you go to an event at the Harvard Club consider your wardrobe. I went in full pedestrian attire and was badly under dressed for the event. How you feel and look helps in how you interact with others. This is my piece of unsolicited advice for today. To the forum…

Seth Godin (Host & Moderator/ Marketing Provocateur moderated a stellar panel that included Tom Peters (Business Iconoclast, Anna Bernasek (Financial Journalist), Michael Eisner (Media Mogul), and Gary Vaynerchuk (Social Media Sommelier) in a loosely structured panel conversation with a Q & A following.

My skill set is listening not detailed note taking so I’ll be giving the tidbits that I picked up and hope they will be relevant for you.

Tom Peters started off by asking that the “damn lights” be turned down so that he could see the audience. Seth Godin said this, “Resumes are a list of brand names that proves you are compliant” setting the theme for the forum. Tom talked about a general lack of manners, saying people don’t listen. He mentioned a great smile as one of the great qualities of a leader. He pointed out that Nelson Mandela’s guard’s spoke of his great smile.

Gary Vaynerchuk spoke about the Internet and interaction. According to him most people don’t take a chance. If you want something then do it. He said, “There is opportunity in the rubble.”

Anna Bernasek said that we take integrity for granted. For the most part we don’t question whether the milk we are buying is OK. We trust that it is safe despite the fact it most go through many hands once it leaves the cow until it gets to us. In her book, The Economics of Integrity, she says, “… we need to understand integrity as not simply a virtue, but a shared asset that brings financial and economic rewards.”

Michael Eisner said that partnerships in life were “a good concept” whether it was in business, or friendships. He said to associate with people who are better then you. My favorite- a brand is not one act but act upon act, upon act.

Next week I want to drill down a little deeper on to some of the things said. Michael Eisner talked about envy. We don’t hear much about that.

This was my overall take on the forum. It was an eclectic collection of the old school business guys like Tom Peters and Michael Eisner, offset with new models of business offered by Gary Vaynerchuk and using social media and some deep thinking about economics from Anna Bernasek. Of course Seth Godin is just creating new roads. They each talked about getting out there and doing something, think beyond your own limitations and most of all be engaged with everyone.

Tom Peters left us with this, “… be kind to everyone”; we are all fighting a great battle.

Meet the speakers.

Anna Bernasek

Michael Eisner

Tom Peters

Gary Vaynerchuk

Seth Godin
Event Moderator